So I've been thinking about stuff lately (what's new?!). Namely, where I'm going, where my site is going, and what my purpose is in all this. Do I want to target the mass consciousness and keep unravelling media lies? Should this be yet another conspiracy website reporting on the latest alternative news headlines, or should I take things in a different direction? At the moment I'm not sure, so I'm sort of stuck in the middle. But I'm thinking I would like to start veering away from hardcore conspiracy stuff in the New Year. I've had this debate with myself so many times - am I striking the right balance between being aware of what's going on, and yet still staying sane? Am I simply buying into another illusion by what I'm doing? I always tell myself I can handle all this conspiracy research, but then I keep reading shit like this and getting really upset/agitated..... and this agitation filters through into my day-to-day consciousness. It can't be healthy. I read a profound quote the other day that went: "You can be right in the outer things you criticize but not be right in your motives and vibration". That hit me hard, and it's something I will bear in mind when thinking about a possible new direction for my website. So watch this space!
Besides doing too much introspection, I also just spent two hectic but wonderful weeks at a little Steiner school doing observation and a little bit of teaching practice. All the children's activities are imbued with a sense of fun and personal development, rather than just pumping facts into their heads. It was lovely to watch. On the last day they made me a Christmas card and sang me some carols, which was very sweet. I must say though, I would love to just cancel Christmas this year. I keep trying to make myself buy cards and things for people, so as not to disappoint anyone, but as soon as I set foot in the shops I'm like "NOOO!" and want to run out again. The atmosphere is oppressive; going to the local shopping mall is like stepping into the inner circle of hell. Yeah, I'm becoming increasingly cynical in my old age. Until next time!....
Besides doing too much introspection, I also just spent two hectic but wonderful weeks at a little Steiner school doing observation and a little bit of teaching practice. All the children's activities are imbued with a sense of fun and personal development, rather than just pumping facts into their heads. It was lovely to watch. On the last day they made me a Christmas card and sang me some carols, which was very sweet. I must say though, I would love to just cancel Christmas this year. I keep trying to make myself buy cards and things for people, so as not to disappoint anyone, but as soon as I set foot in the shops I'm like "NOOO!" and want to run out again. The atmosphere is oppressive; going to the local shopping mall is like stepping into the inner circle of hell. Yeah, I'm becoming increasingly cynical in my old age. Until next time!....
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